


Handle with care

by PoisonJack



Series: The gift that keeps on giving [3]
Category: Borderlands, Tales from the Borderlands - Fandom
Genre: Dignity is the name of his penis LOLOL, Drunken idiots, Established Relationship, General au, M/M, Making Out, Multi, RIP Jack's dignity, Rhys will sell you out sooner or later Tim, Threesome, Truth or Dare, handjobs, yeah like that isn't a recipe for disaster right there ahahha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-17
Updated: 2016-02-17
Packaged: 2018-05-21 06:50:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6042154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PoisonJack/pseuds/PoisonJack
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Movie night turns into sexy times turns into Jack passed out on the couch while drunk Tim and Rhys play truth or dare. As if nothing bad would come of that....</p>
<p>For the muse sentence prompts meme on tumblr: 'I dare you' or 'I dare you to'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Handle with care

**Author's Note:**

> This was one of the first sitting in my inbox forever but something just popped into my head before bed so i cranked this out. :)

It started out innocently enough.

Jack, Rhys, and Tim had settled together on the CEO's couch with beer and popcorn for a movie marathon. 

One beer turned into six, movies turned into Jack urging Rhys and Tim to make out, and one sweaty, satisfied threesome later and Jack was dozing naked with his head over the edge of the couch while Rhys tried throwing popcorn into Tim's mouth. 

Most of the popcorn ended up on the floor since Rhys' coordination had gone to shit around beer number four, and Tim just laughed and suggested they play something else.

That was where they should have called it a night.

Instead, the two got into a game of Truth or Dare.

"Truth."

" _Ooookay_.... Tell me...the weirdest thing you have with Jack's face on it."

Rhys' drunken face momentarily frowned before he smirked. "Weird like as in 'why is Jack's face _that_ thing', or weird like 'why would they put Jack's face on stu- something like _that'_?"

Tim grinned. "You...you've got both don't you?"

"I'm an avid collector," Rhys said unrepentantly.

"Okay, weirdest item."

"That's definitely the toenail clippers."

Tim frowned in thought as he retrieved one of the half-full beers on the table. "That's not so weird."

"Well Jack's face is kind of put on like.... So his mouth is the clipper part right? So it looks like he's biting your nails off."

Tim choked on the beer as Rhys tried to keep his snickering to a minimum so they wouldn't wake Jack. 

"That's-- No. No no no that's a scary image." Rhys just grinned, unashamed and almost proud. "If I have nightmares tonight you're getting wake- woke up. I'm waking you up."

"Okay my turn."

"What's the other weird thing?" Tim interrupted.

"That would be the one I keep around just to freak out Vaughn," Rhys snickered. " _Handsome Jack's laxatives._ It's a really nice mag- image of him but...combined with that... Pretty disturbing."

Tim snickered, voice low as he looked at their boss and lover. "Well he _is_ full of shit sometimes. Could use a bit... a dose of his own medicine."

"The box claims 'you'll shit bricks!'" Tim snorted as Rhys looked at Jack with an amused quirk to his lip. "I dunno if he personally okays this stuff or not but would you be surprised?" 

Tim just shook his head, trying not to remember that he and Jack shared the same face. Unforeseen hazards of the job he supposed. "Okay go."

"Truth or dare?" Rhys asked Tim. 

"Dare," the other man challenged with a challenging look to his green and blue eyes.

"I dare you to...." Rhys looked around the penthouse, trying to think in his gaze of something sufficient. His eyes fell on the gently snoring CEO, and he got a devilish smirk to his lips. "I dare you to draw a dick on Jack's face."

Tim's eyes widened as Rhys dissolved into drunken snickers, biting his lips with looks between the sleeping CEO and the man's double.

"Come on. I dare you."

"N-n-n-no no way," Tim told him with an amused but wary grin. Tim regarded Jack like the man might jump up and grab him just for the suggestion. He may have edged a bit back into the couch cushions without thinking.

"Reaaaally? You won't do the dare?"

Tim smirked. "...it's like drawing on my own face..." the double weakly excused. 

"You know what happens if you won't do it...."

Tim just grinned taking two attempts to get up from where he was sitting to cross to Rhys, boxing the other man in. "Yeah I know," he said, sounding far too pleased. Rhys only grinned up at him as the other man met his lips, kissing and fondling him. 

The punishment for not completing a dare was to make out with the other person for five minutes. Rhys set a timer in his echoeye as the other man devoured his mouth. Five minutes past and Rhys didn't mention it to Tim. Around seven minutes, the double caught on. "Are you cheating, Rhys?"

"No no I- no way I would never do that."

"Okay now, your turn." Rhys whined as Tim moved away from him. The other man had managed to get him half-hard, but he refused to get him off. "The rules are five minutes... No touching yourself!"

"Come on _pleeeeease_? I dare you to finish me off?" Rhys pleaded. It made Tim smile with amusement, the cybernetic man using those gorgeous pouty lips against him.

"I didn't choose dare again, and it's not your turn," Tim pointed out with a wicked grin.

"Pleeeease Tim come on." Rhys was already halfway across the couch to crouch in Tim's lap. "Pleeeease?"

With Rhys this close, he could hardly refuse. He spared a glance to Jack, the older man still asleep and dead to the world, and a mischievous look entered his eyes. "Alright, kiddo. But you _have_ to choose dare next."

"Okay okay," Rhys conceded, kissing Tim's jaw and wrapping arms around him. 

"And you can't back out since you're going twice," Tim told him as he wrapped arms around Rhys' middle, his own cock thickening again with Rhys' pleading voice and the way he writhed in his lap.

"I promise I swear put- please, Tim."

With a grin and much enthusiasm, Tim ended up getting them both off a short while later. Rhys lay on his chest in a drunken slumber while Tim kissed at his skin, drunkenly amused with himself.

"Rhys, I know your dare," Tim started with a soft, slightly threatening tone. "I _dare_ you to...."

\--

Jack didn't know when or how the three of them had gotten into the large and expensive bed in the penthouse, but he was grateful not to wake up on the carpet again like the last time they'd had a little 'night in'.

He peeled himself from the two sleeping on either side of him, both younger men covered in hickies and bruises and sleeping the sleep of the inebriated.

It was still very early, and Jack wouldn't have gotten up from between those warm bodies if not for the powerful urge to piss. He wobbled his way into the bathroom, and back in the bed Rhys unconsciously squirmed into the warm spot Jack had vacated, the movements having stirred him slightly from slumber.

He was just falling back asleep when Jack's booming voice came from the bathroom.

" _Tim! Rhys!_ Which one of you assholes wrote shipping instructions on my dick?!"

Rhys hunkered down in the covers as he heard the flush of the toilet. Hazy images and words filtered through his brain; 'handle with care', 'fragile', 'this way up'. Tim's snickering and a black marker. What did they do last night?

Jack came out of the bathroom to stand arms akimbo, glaring, and Rhys' eyes went straight to the older man's cock. It was smudged, but that was _definitely_ his handwriting, even from this far away.

Jack must have noticed the look of guilt in his eyes because he immediately set upon the younger man as Rhys scrambled out of bed.

Tim awoke completely confused to the commotion, wondering why Jack was chasing Rhys around the bedroom brandishing his ink-stained cock at the stem in a showcasing manner. When Rhys fled the bedroom buckass naked and Jack marched out, dick in hand telling him to get back there, Tim just rolled over and pulled the blankets over his head with a smirk.

Jack hadn't even seen what Rhys had drawn on his ass yet.

**Author's Note:**

> Also posted over at my tumblr. My Masterpost list of fics is linked at the very top of the blog. I post the stuff I like best on ao3, but I have many more stories linked in that post that aren't here. Knock yourself out :3
> 
> http://purge-that-urge-rhackathon.tumblr.com


End file.
